when i shouldn't be working

1. i don't need to wake up as early as usual.
2. i don't need to wear long sleeves, because it will be hot.
3. i don't need to come in leather shoes; i can wear my favourite pair.
4. i can park at in the office compound.
5. i have the building's broadband internet bandwidth at my disposal.
6. i have to remind myself to do work.
7. i can go home earlier than usual.

which do you remind of ?

it was the time again
to break up the ice
we played this game
which turned out quite nice

on the square piece of paper
placed in your hand
about the one to your left
you have to pen

not to write
just any remark of your choice
but an appropriate cartoon character
that matches his air and voice

as we inscribe the new names
after a hard look at their faces
some had no problems
while others take ages

with the inscription now clearly written
and stuck to the back of our companion
around we go and we must question
to come to knowledge of our new designation

i can't help but wonder
what was written by my right-hander
near the end i did manage to discover
that i remind my friend... of a carrot-loving creature

q&e

will i be able to bring myself through the doorway?
will there be hope or only despair?
will things be new or stay unchanged?

shall i dread going there from now on?
knowing there exists a wall that i will come upon?
and furthermore a chasm so deep and long?

i want to be there,
they want me to be there,
i want everyone to be there

i want not that facade when i am near
i want not that heart when i am around
i want not that disposition which i did not ask for

look at the forest, and not just a tree they said
remember the rest and do not be discouraged
but kept out and snubbed by just one - i truly hate

runaway

i'm looking for a sign
to show me how to cross this distance
and leave this all behind

i want to run away but there is no motion
just lifeless moments locked outside
and all that's left are tears to cool the sun

will you reach out to me
and pull me through a world of sorrow?
to where I'm meant to be
from the dark into the light?

everything here is grey
please tell me that there is such a place

where hearts will never be broken
dreams will not ever die
souls are never searching
or crying out for a reason why

where love is everlasting
a place where there are no more fears
far away from here

i want to go far away from here
i want to fly far away from here...

so what is it?

just as i thought things will get better...

so whose problem is it now, yours or mine?

this day

... it has been a long one,
would have been much longer
if not for the 3-hour nap.

... i thank everyone
who have made it so special,
and cherish all the messages
written to me.

... i am giving my life
to Him once again;
i want to become
what i am made to be.

... i will trust Him
and trust Him more,
because He sees
and knows it all.

... this chorus really speaks for me:

i want to leave a legacy
how will they remember me?
did i choose to love?
did i point to You enough?
to make a mark on things
i want to leave an offering
a child of mercy and grace
who blessed Your name shamelessly
and leave that kind of legacy


"Legacy" - Nichole Nordeman

lone

this dark, narrow path needs to be walked down alone;
no one can follow.

i know that deep inside i am never alone.

still, in moments like these, having someone around helps.

reaching

thank You for the life You have given me.

thank You for the joys to brighten my days.

thank You for the sorrows to keep me near You.

thank You for everyone You placed around me.

thank You for always being there for me.

thank You for letting me be a blessing.

thank You for You.

¾

i asked for ½, they gave me a ¼, so i told him i asked for a ½.

he took away the ¼ and returned a moment later with a ½ along with what looked like the ¼ beside it, and he said "½".

so did that mean i had a ¾? i hoped not, but it sure felt like a ¾ and i'm sure it isn't on the menu.

production notes

it was very eventful, reflecting on the death and resurrection of Jesus as a community. it also made a difference when one or two took the initiative to present items for this significant weekend.

only a month earlier, we decided that Easter was supposed to be a much more meaningful even for us than Christmas is, and yet we never really did anything. so, we decided to do something.

after our initial idea was deemed unsuitable, an 'old' song managed to inspire a tambourine dance. such meaningful lyrics - the gospel in a song as she put it. this time, idea accepted. so we went ahead.

problem was, the first three lines of the song could not be 'danced' out. this is where visual support comes in. brainstorm, research, sketches on paper, trace, colour, sequence, test, fine-tune... about two weeks spent in all. not to mention the dance choreography and hours of practice into the night.

all right, Easter is taken care of.

Good Friday? didn't think about it... until asked to present an item. about 4 days before. so what are we going to do? a song presentation is the only possible option, had a few songs in mind. but not enough time for anyone to practice. so this is where visual support comes in again.

proposed to portray stills from Passion of the Christ onto this song given to me a few months back. sounds easy. until i had to watch the movie. i saw it few years back, but now watching it again drove me near to tears until i had to lock my room door.

i survived and managed to put a decent presentation together. i didn't expect it to go far as i only had two nights on it, compared to the two weeks put into the first one. also because the movie was so much more powerful than what i put together. entrusting it to God, i prepped it for presentation.

it was presented on the Good Friday service. feedback? very powerful and moving. praise God. some asked to have a copy. guess the video turned out much better than i expected.

i couldn't wait for Easter Sunday (because Easter is a much more significant celebration). they had the anticipating tambourine practice on Saturday night.

Easter came, and the dance was beautiful. well done, dancers!

service is over, and i got requests for the Good Friday video.

until today, i still receive requests for the Good Friday video.

truly, God works in mysterious ways. what was done in less than two days could go so far. it cannot be me, it can only be Him.

» "why"
» "wide open"

the fool

"you fool, why are you embracing your cross?!" said the criminal to Jesus.

Passion of the Christ reminded us of how much Jesus had to go through. when, being God Himself, He didn't have to at all.

He chose to be made a fool so that we don't have to be. the death He suffered was undeserved and most humiliating, and yet he could still embrace His cross and carried it in determination to the top of the hill.

i'm still asking, "why did He have to do that? am i worth that much for Him to love, to the point of suffering and death?"